Good News for Frustrated, Burned-Out Übermoms (and dads, too)

Kick back; chill out

This is just a little freaky. In the car with Mrs. Wonderful (she's my claim to the Mr. Wonderful title: I took her title on an honorary basis) yesterday, I channeled James Lileks and Muffy Mead-Ferro. *huh?!?* Yep. Got all soap-boxy on over-scheduled, super-pampered kids and the parents who bring them up to be spoiled brats who think the world and everyone in it owe them happiness.

So, how is this a bright spot? See Lileks' Bleat post, yesterday. (Go ahead, run his bandwidth usage up. *heh*) As a mostly work-from-home dad, Lileks makes some cogent observations, including this one:

"... I live in a world of moms, and their sense of ingenuity and amusement are a constant source of delight. I remember asking one mom how she dealt with all the tiny plastic pieces of Polly Pocket clothing that clutter the play room.

She rolled her eyes and grinned and made a back-and-forth motion with her hand. Hoover them up and move along."

Chill. The perfect is the enemy of the good (or as Lileks put it, "... the perfect is the enemy of the fun.").

And Muffy Mead-Ferro? Here's one Muffy with her head on straight. Author of "Confessions of a Slacker Mom," Muffy has her priporities in order:

“A lot of woman call it selfish unless you’re constantly putting your kids’ needs first. But I think that’s just bogus.”

Relax: kids are healthier if their every whim is NOT catered to, if their life is NOT filled with constant mini-vanning from one special activity after another. C'mon, now. How many of us grew up playing in the back yard after school? Cub Scouts or Brownies (back in the days when those organizations weren't overwhelmed by the ACLU and NOW and were just fun afternoon activities once a week in a neighbor's back yard or house) were OK. Maybe children's choirs at church. Some kids played in community-sponsored or church-sponsored sports or did things ocassionally at a pre-ACLU YMCA.

But all those things were preipheral, way back in the bad old days. More common were things like playing "500" out in the neighborhood street or making (not buying) and flying kites, right in one's own neighborhood. Doing chores around the house and yard. Homework often done before dinner and a relaxing evening.

Chill out. Take it easy. Let kids just be kids, explore their world as kids, have fun (or not) as they use their own creativity and resoueces. help out, but back off and enjoy along with them. Ferrying kids from one frenetic activity to the next isn't a life: it's just another job.

Chill out.